Fail Russia
by Sanity and Katlin
Summary: This is Human AU based off a fail that happened to a friend of mine... which is why Pikachu is mentioned... -.- It's Ivan's first time drinking. (Mild coarse language considering quite a bit that comes out of Ivan's mouth comes from my friend who doesnèt really have a filter... but nothing major)


Fail Russia: Russia's first time drinking with Pikachu

* * *

This is Human AU based off a fail that happened to a friend of mine... which is why Pikachu is mentioned... -.-

* * *

It was dark as Ivan snuck out of the house that he lived in with Batukhan. Gilbert, one of the older boys had convinced him to go drinking with him and his friends. Ivan creped away from the house until he rounded the corner before beginning to run for another block. Once he deemed himself far enough away, he slowed to a walk as he continued to the bar he was meeting Gilbert at. The albino waved to him from beside his friends Antonio and Francis.

"Hola Ivan, glad you could make it." Antonio said smiling.

"Privet." Ivan said still looking around as if waiting for Batukhan to pop out from behind something.

"Ah, relax Ivan. It'll be fine." Gilbert said slinging and arm across Ivan's shoulders, leading him into the bar.

"Da, you are right." Ivan replied beginning to smile.

"Oh, he looks so sweet." Francis cooed to the 15 year old boy before cringing as the purple eyes glared at him. "Mon Due! That's creepier then when little Matthew snaps."

"Don't mind him Ivan, he's a chicken shit." Gilbert then laughed at his blond friend as they finally reached the bar. "What'll it be Ivan?"

"Vodka."

"Straight?" Gilbert raised his eyebrow.

"Da. I'm Russian, I can do it. And none of your German stuff. Good Russian Vodka."

Gilbert simply shrugged before ordering the drinks. Handing the small Russian his drink, he smirked as Ivan downed his drink in one swallow before beginning to cough. "Want something else now? I'm sure we could get you a vodka cocktail."

Ivan simply glared at the red eyed boy, "Het, I'm not going to drink one of those pussy girly drinks. Another vodka."

They continued like this until Ivan had had around a dozen drinks and was beginning to weave a bit in his seat.

"Hey, Ivan? What's with the yellow mouse anyways?" Antonio asked at one point. "It's been bugging me all night."

Ivan's eyes widened, "He is not a mouse! He is a Pikachu!" Ivan's eyes narrowed, "When I rule the world everyone will know that! Anyone who doesn't will die."

The Spanish boy stepped away from the younger one as a dark aura seemed to surround him.

"Woah, ok. It's a Pikachu!" Antonio said holding his hands up in surrender.

Ivan quickly went back to smiling before turning and throwing up.

"Hey!" Francis looked slightly panicked as Gilbert lifted Ivan's arm over his shoulders.

"We should get him to Kat's." The other two nodded and they began almost dragging Ivan from the bar.

They quickly walked down the street until they reached the small white house where Katyusha lived. Antonio ran and knocked on the door, waiting impatiently for Katyusha to open the door.

"Oh, thank God." He breathed when Katyusha finally opened the door.

"Oh! What happened to Ivan?" She asked even as she ran to her younger brother.

"Well, you see, Antonio, Francis and I took him out drinking, and he seems to have had too much. Could you look after him for us? Just for the night."

"I'm sorry Gilbert. I can't. I promised mom that I would have nothing to do with Ivan if I left."

Gilbert looked at the large breasted woman in shock, "What? I thought you liked Ivan?"

"I do! I love my little brother! But it was the only way our mom would take me away from Batukhan. We wanted to take Ivan with us but Batukhan keeps such a close eye on him..." She trailed off, looking liked she was about to cry.

"Oh, sorry." They turned and walked back out onto the sidewalk.

"Now what?" Antonio asked.

Francis simply shrugged but Gilbert suddenly smiled, "The Baltic boys. We'll take him there."

The other two nodded and they set off quickly. When they arrived, Gilbert knocked and waited for one of them to open the door. When the door was opened it was Toris. "Oh good! I didn't want to deal with Eduard." Gilbert then dropped Ivan in Toris' arms, "He's your problem now. Bye!"

* * *

Names:

Ivan - Russia

Gilbert - Prussia

Antonio - Spain

Francis - France

Katyusha - Ukraine

Batukhan - Mongolia

Toris - Lithuania

Eduard - Estonia


End file.
